Losing is part of the game of chess and an important part of a young chess player’s growth. As a chess coach or chess parent, one of our most important roles is helping a child deal with a difficult loss at a chess tournament.
Step 1
After every round, examine the chess game together in a meticulous manner regardless if your student/child won or lost. Doing this creates a habit of calm reflection which is especially important after a tough loss.
Step 2
Immediately after finishing the post game analysis of a loss, have your child/student explain to you which mistake(s) most directly led to their loss. If your child/student seems unclear when explaining their mistake, then it is worthwhile to spend some extra time helping them to understand the concept.
Step 3
Reaffirm that it is ok to lose at chess as long as you have learned something of value.
Step 4
Failure is an emotional time for a child. Do your best to make sure your chess student/child does not carry emotional baggage from one round to the next. Remind him/her that every round is a fresh opportunity to play great chess.
By following the steps above you will be teaching positive behaviors to your child/student, which will almost certainly lead to future successes. However, patience is the key as chess is a longterm commitment for a child and success is not defined by wins in a single weekend, month or even year but rather keeping the child passionate about chess for years to come.
